Concern Things to Remember Key Questions Friction between director and educator or staff Focus on me, then we; think about what in How can you change your reactions to the a situation is upsetting you and how you situation? can respond, not just focus on changing the What do I really want out of the situation? educator or how they feel or act. How can I ask what my educator wants? What is my role in the situation? Concerns with educator behavior, attitude, actions, Refuse the false dichotomy of either-or; either How do I go about finding a resolution that observed by director you change your behavior or there will be supports both myself and the educator? consequences What can you do to ensure clear messaging and connect with the educator in a positive way? STATE: Share your facts, Tell your story, Ask for other's facts, Talk tentatively, Encourage sharing Concerns with educator behavior, attitude, actions, Dialog is always an option; encourage and What can I do to rebuild trust between observed by colleague support crucial conversations between colleagues? colleagues Are we actively exploring other's views? Observed symptoms of trauma Make it safe: apologize when appropriate, ABC: Agree, Build, Compare Confusion commit to finding a common goal in processing Am I avoiding necessary concerns or Difficulty concentrating or completing work trauma, and recognize the need for connection creating unnecessary conflict? Withdrawing from others AMPP: Ask, Mirror, Paraphrase, Prime Talk of guilt, shame, or self-blame Does my team know that I respect them, and do they believe my goals in this Irritability, mood swings situation are to help? Withdrawing from colleagues Observed symptoms of anxiety Emotions don't just happen; others don't How do I continue to support an ongoing Trouble concentrating or completing work make you feel a certain way, and you are dialog to reduce the strain and provide Increased use of sick days more than your emotions. Help others process some control in this situation? Reported sleeping issues their emotions in a safe space through active, Are my questions and actions focusing on Avoidance of responsibilities or colleagues responsive listening the facts? Is our conversation supporting the processing of emotions? Increased restlessness How can I help my educators take control of Shortened temper/rage their stories instead of falling into the role of helplessness or victim? Observed symptoms of burnout Focus on the person, not just the behavior; why Am I confidently expressing my concerns in Reports of exhaustion would a rational, reasonable professional be a supportive, nonjudgmental manner? Changes in mood or personality acting in this manner? Am I going to silence or violence in this situation (withdrawing from concerns or Difficulty with memory becoming judgmental)? Reported sense of lowered competence How can I guide us toward mutual purpose, Observed sense of defeat or lack of success or focusing on what needs to be done and achievement in tasks how we can get there