Evaluate and briefly discuss which paragraph is more effective in making the argument more persuasive and why.

First Draft

Did the actions of DCS employees, the DCS policy of performing background checks solely on prospective foster parents, or the DCS policy allowing for discretion in following up on allegations of abuse violate foster children's substantive due process right to be free from infliction of unnecessary harm?

Final Draft

Whether Defendants are entitled to summary judgment because Plaintiffs have failed to establish the necessary element of a 1983 claim since neither the actions of City employees nor City policy caused a violation of foster children's substantive due process rights.