Exercises for Perfecting Your Writing To review chapter content related to each set of exercises, refer to the indicated Learning Objective.

The You Attitude Rewrite the following sentences to reflect your audiences viewpoint.

4-11. We request that you include the order number with your inquiry.

4-12. We insist that you always bring your credit card to the store.

4-13. I cant get my reports in on time if you wont finalize the sales data.

4-14. As a measure of our goodwill, we are sending the refund for $25.

Emphasizing the Positive Revise these sentences to be positive rather than negative.

4-15. To avoid damage to your credit rating, please remit payment within 10 days.

4-16. We dont make refunds on returned merchandise that is soiled.

4-17. You should have realized that waterbeds will freeze in unheated houses during winter. Therefore, our guarantee does not cover the valve damage and you must pay the $9.50 valve-replacement fee (plus postage).

Emphasizing the Positive Revise the following sentences to replace unflattering terms (in italics) with euphemisms.

4-18. The new boss is (stubborn) when it comes to doing things by the book.

4-19. When you say weve doubled our profit level, you are (wrong).

4-20. Just be careful not to make any (stupid) choices this week.

4-21. Jim Riley is too (incompetent) for that kind of promotion.

4-22. Glen monopolizes every meeting by being (a loudmouth).

Courteous Communication Revise the following sentences to make them more courteous.

4-23. You claim that you mailed your cheque last Thursday but we have not received it.

4-24. It is not our policy to exchange sale items, especially after they have been worn.

4-25. You neglected to sign the enclosed contract.

4-26. I received your letter, in which you assert that our shipment was three days late.

4-27. You failed to enclose your instructions for your new will.

Bias-Free Language Rewrite each of the following sentences to eliminate bias.

4-28. A pilot must have the ability to stay calm under pressure and then he must be trained to cope with any problem that arises.

4-29. Candidate Renata Parsons, a wife and the mother of a teenager, will attend the debate.

4-30. For as old as he is, Sam Nugent is still one of our most active sales reps.

Selecting Words In the following sentences, replace vague phrases (underlined) with concrete phrases. Make up any details you might need.

4-31. We will be opening our new facility sometime this spring.

4-32. After the reception, we were surprised that such a large number attended.

4-33. The new production line has been operating with increased efficiency on every run.

4-34. Over the holiday, we hired a crew to expand the work area.

Selecting Words In the following sentences, replace weak terms (in italics) with words that are stronger.

4-35. The two reporters (ran after) every lead enthusiastically.

4-36. The (bright) colours in that ad are keeping customers from seeing what we have to sell.

4-37. Health costs (suddenly rise) when management forgets to emphasize safety issues.

4-38. Once we solved the zoning issue, new business construction (moved forward) and the district has been flourishing ever since.

Selecting Words Rewrite these sentences to replace the clichs with fresh, personal expressions.

4-39. Being a jack-of-all-trades, Dave worked well in his new selling job.

4-40. Dont hesitate to call our office any time.

4-41. You are our valued customers. Please feel free to send us your questions.

4-42. Thank you in advance for your co-operation on this matter.

4-43. Its a dog-eat-dog world out there in the rat race of the asphalt jungle.

Selecting Words In the following sentences, replace long, complicated words with short, simple ones.

4-44. Management (inaugurated) the recycling policy six months ago.

4-45. You can convey the same meaning without (utilizing) the same words.

4-46. Youll never be promoted unless you (endeavour) to be more patient.

4-47. I have to wait until payday to (ascertain) whether I got the raise.

4-48. John will send you a copy once hes inserted all the (alterations) youve requested.

Selecting Words Rewrite the following sentences, replacing obsolete phrases with up-to-date versions. Write none if you think there is no appropriate substitute.

4-49. I have completed the form and returned it to my insurance company, as per your instructions.

4-50. Attached herewith is a copy of our new contract for your records.

4-51. Even though it will increase the price of the fence, we have decided to use the redwood in lieu of the cedar.

4-52. Please be advised that your account with National Bank has been compromised and we advise you to close it as soon as possible.

Using active and passive voice Rewrite the following sentences so that they are active rather than passive.

4-53. The raw data are submitted to the data-processing division by the sales representative each Friday.

4-54. High profits are publicized by management.

4-55. The policies announced in the directive were implemented by the staff.

4-56. Our computers are serviced by the Santee Company.

4-57. The employees were represented by Janet Hogan.