John: Hey, Ross, come on in. Have a seat. Look, I wanted to schedule a private meeting with you because I have a concern we need to discuss. So I wouldn't be doing you a service as your teammate if I didn't let you know that you sometimes come across as maybe a little condescending, a little arrogant towards the rest of the team. 

Ross: You are not my supervisor. Why should I care what your evaluation is of me?

John: Well, because I can see how your behavior directly influences the team, so let me just give an example. Just today in our staff meeting, Alison raised a point about the upcoming conference. She just suggested that we man a conference booth with six people instead of four, so then that way the extra two people can just be sets of hands passing out raffle tickets. You just jumped in immediately and said, no, that's not something we're going to do. That's not going to work. And you didn't give any explanation why you felt that way. You just allowed an awkward silence and then you took our conversation in a totally different direction. You basically just dismissed her in front of the team, and you didn't give any explanation as to why you didn't think her idea wasn't good. How do you think that made her feel? 

Ross: It's not my job to manage her feelings. [LAUGHS] Besides, it was a silly idea. We can barely fit four, much less six people in our tiny booth. My job is not to coddle these people. If they need somebody to be nice to them, they can get that at home. 

John: Look, I don't feel like this conversation's getting very far in terms of me just being able to sensitize you as to how you're coming across to the team. Look, people regard you as aloof, kind of distant, condescending, maybe a little arrogant. And in other words, your behavior's directly impeding our team's ability to collaborate and just have open communication in general.

Ross: I'm going to-- I'm going to say my earlier statement. You are not my supervisor. You do not have authority over me, and I don't need to care about how you or anyone else perceives me. If there's a problem with my behavior, I'll let our boss tell me about it, and not you. 

John: OK, look. We all have to work together as a team for the foreseeable future, every single day. So don't you shoulder some responsibility to just help us have a team environment? 

Ross: Creating a team environment was not in the job description, OK? I show up. I work hard, and frankly work harder than some people here. This team is lucky to have me. [LAUGHS] 

Jonh: I totally disagree. You and your attitude are constantly interfering with our otherwise effective teamwork. Look, I wanted to come to you first, but if you don't want to listen to what I have to say, I'll just elevate my complaint to somebody who does want to listen to me. 

Ross: Are you threatening me? Are you threatening to go to my supervisor if I don't cave in to your request? Real mature. 

John: All right, look. This meeting is over. I'm going to report you and your behavior, and at this point, that's all there is to it. 

Ross: Fine. [DOOR SLAM] 

 

Next, answer the following:

• After reviewing conflict scenario lay out two different third-party methods that could be used to resolve conflict. Compare and contrast and argue for what you think is the best method and why. (Consider from the following: Process control is the ability to organize or structure procedures. This could include when and where parties meet, time limits (speaking, intervention sessions), decision making rules, and rules of decorum. This type of control is usually associated with a more formal mandate. Content control is the ability to influence arguments and the terms of a final agreement. This might look like attacking points made, interpreting, framing or reframing, adding issues, presenting additional information, or suggesting terms for an agreement. Motivational control is the degree to which third parties can induce parties to perform desired managers. This can look like controlling incentives to make parties comply or participate. For example, parents often have motivational control as an option when they intervene.)
• Then, discuss how you think the conflict would resolve using your choice for the best method (from the preceding prompt). In this discussion be sure to detail the forms of intervention (Arbitrators, Mediators, or Facilitators and Conciliators), and all the ways that the third party would impact the conflict resolution process (exs: how they might frame the conflict, how they could impact behavior, what new strategies or procedures they could bring to the process).