Message Strategies: Writing Routine Replies; Completing:

Evaluating Content, Organization, and Tone

[LO-4], Chapter 5 Analyze the strengths and weaknesses of this message and then revise it so that it follows this chapter’s guidelines for writing routine replies in a positive manner:

We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected for the one year Master’s Degree in Paediatric Surgery program at Brown University, beginning this fall. Your application, though rather late, has been accepted. Your academic credentials have impressed us, as did your work in the area of congenital heart disease. While the skills you’ve demonstrated are commendable, the techniques you’ve adopted are rather primitive and obsolete in today’s neo-natal surgical practice. I am sure that this course will provide you with the latest procedural insights and also enable you to research and develop new techniques that could shape the future of paediatric heart surgery.

We are sorry to inform you, however, that your request for a scholarship to the program has been rejected and you have to pay the entire course fee of $22,000.00. This does not include charges towards boarding and lodging, which we assume you have already arranged for. Kindly confirm your attendance for this program by depositing an amount of $ 10,000.00 within seven days as payment for the first semester, following which you will receive confirmation of your registration.