How might someone exhibit five of the distrusting behaviors in the Distrust column when in a relationship where lack of trust is a major issue? 

How might that begin to build trust in the relationship using the corresponding trust-building behaviors in the second column?

 

 

Distrust Constantly evaluating others. Directing judgmental statements at persons and personalities. Attempting to control another's actions, words, expression of feelings. Trust Avoiding all value judgments of persons and personalities. Objecting to specific behaviors, not the "behaver." Respecting freedom to think, feel, choose. Using strategies to get desired outcomes, manipulation or threat. Making simple, honest statements and clear open requests. Acting neutral when feelings get tense. Acting distant and superior when another feels weak or hurt. Demanding absolute promises and ironclad guarantees from others. Being willing to give of yourself when there is risk. Being vulnerable as an equal with equals. Allowing room for spontaneous choices, responses and actions. Dogmatically asserting your opinions and viewpoints as right and always right. Giving tentative statements that are open to others' feelings. Reader Pret