How would you reply>>>>>..

Dear ______:

My name is Tim. I am sixteen years old. I am a Junior in High School. Last year, I came out of the closet. I admitted to my family and friends that I am gay. Since then, my life has changed so much for the worse. My Dad has threatened to kick me out of the house if I do not change. He almost never speaks to me. My Mom says she supports who I am but her attitude says something different. She doesn't take me with her anymore when she visits her friends. I think she is ashamed of me. Most of my old friends have deserted me. It is almost like I have some kind of disease! I do not understand why this is happening to me. The minister at my church says I am a sinner and that if I don't change I will go to hell. It's not that I don't want to change - I don't think I can. I have known for quite some time that I am different from most other kids. When I was young I was never interested in activities that normal boys go into - my father would get so angry with me when I told him I didn't want to join a Little League team. But he forced me to anyway. All those afternoons I spent in right field! All the times my Dad and coach yelled at me for striking out! When all I wanted was an Easy Bake oven...

I wish I could be someone else! I wish I didn't have these feelings - I have bought magazines with naked women and tried to jerk off to them, but I just can't! What is the matter with me? Why can't I be like everyone else? Why do I have to be so different? Is this God punishing me? What did I do to deserve this!

Lately, I've been thinking that perhaps everyone, especially my parents, would be happier without me. I have spent much time thinking about the ways I would kill myself. I thought about taking a bunch of pills - but what if someone discovered me - how could I ever face anyone again! Perhaps hanging or if I could only get my hands on a gun - but what am I talking about - do I really want to die? Although, I think killing myself would be the best for everyone concerned some part of me wants to celebrate who I am - It's like...

...like I'm drowning and the water is over my head -

Please, Please, Please help me....