Question
REQUIRED: 1. Your rough draft is missing a subject line. Write an effective subject line that is appropriate for the Scenario described above. 2. Evaluate
REQUIRED:
1. Your rough draft is missing a subject line. Write an effective subject line that is appropriate for the Scenario described above.
2. Evaluate the first sentence of your rough draft. If this is effective, write Correct. If not, create an appropriate first sentence.
3. Your rough draft is missing a goodwill close. Write an effective goodwill close that is appropriate for the Scenario described above.
Directions: Study both the scenario and e-mail message rough draft below. Then, answer each question. When answering Questions 1 - 3, you may create fictional information if necessary.
SCENARIO
You are the HR manager for HealthFirst Inc. Your companys accountant has recently informed you that your workers compensation insurance premiums are higher than industry standards. Along with this, you have noticed that employees are taking more sick days this year, compared with last year. You have also observed lately that your employees look more stressed and fatigued than usual.
You have shared this information with your company president, Jean Miller. Realizing the connection between physical fitness and employee well-being, she has suggested that you research some options for improving employee health and fitness at the company. Specifically, she has asked you to report your recommendations in an e-mail message, using direct order, by April 4.
After careful research, you have concluded that the company should implement an employee fitness program.
Last week, you had written a rough draft of the e-mail message to Jean, as shown below. However, after proofreading your rough draft, you realize that you will need to fix your mistakes before sending the final draft to your company president.
E-mail Message ROUGH DRAFT
DATE: March 28, 2019
TO: Jean Miller, President
SUBJECT:
(1) An increase in workers compensation (WC) insurance premiums has been observed in our company over the past 12 months. (2) In addition, a higher number of sick days have been taken this year. (3) On March 1 you asked me to research some options to reduce WC claims and ameliorate the health of our employees.
(4) As a result, I am reccomending that we introduce an employee fitness program in several stages. (5) With a fitness program, we can ensure the health and safety of every employee. (6) I offer my full and complete support with implimenting this program. (7) Please dont hesitate to contact me as soon as possible if I can help you with anything else.
(8) According to researchers, workplace health and fitness are important for many reasons. (9) For example, if employees will exercise regularly, they will improve their fitness level and reduce their stress levels. (10) Therefore, our company can save money by preventing employee sick days.
(11) Many details about the new program are in the attachment, Program Details.
(!2) It is a practical resource with options for creating effective fitness programs. (13) It can also be used to design a timeline for each stage of the program.
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