Task: A revision plan which outlines the changes you will make and the reasons why you will make those changes. Point of View: The revision plan will use the first-person point of view.

1. When developing a revision plan, a writer should develop detailed notes on the feedback received on the initial draft. A writer might develop a plan based on revising multiple specific aspects of the essay, including, for example, the thesis statement. So, deciding to revise a thesis statement might involve a discussion of the feedback given to the writer about the thesis, a description of what the thesis says and does in the current draft, and how the thesis might improve. A good plan might involve all those ideas. It is a good idea to look at as many aspects of the current draft as possible when developing a revision plan.

2. A writer should carefully evaluate the feedback on the first draft. The paper is the creation of the writer. While targeted feedback is often essential to developing drafts, it is a writer's choice which feedback is useful. Discerning which feedback will be incorporated into a new draft is part of developing as a writer.

3. A writer should find specific solutions for problems with the draft. So, if a draft receives feedback that the thesis of the draft was unclear, that more evidence was necessary, and that the draft was disorganized, the writer find a detailed plan about the steps needed to correct these issues.

TEACHERS NOTES:

1. I encourage you to work on refining your thesis statement. You will want to make it clear to your readers that you are discussing the claims made by research sources.

Example: While many people believe _______about the effects of divorce on children, research argues __________ because ________, __________, and ___________.

2. I encourage you to synthesize at least three sources in each category.

Thank you for an interesting discussion of the research on the effects of divorce on children. Now, here are some suggestions for revision:

3. I encourage you to work on writing a thesis that clearly introduces the fact that you are summarizing and synthesizing research claims.

4. I strongly urge you to discuss several sources in each category. Generally, I ask students to shoot for at least three sources in each category. Sometimes categories need to be combined, or sources added, to achieve this goal.

5. I encourage you to synthesize your sources. You've started to do this in some sections of the essay. Now, I want to encourage you to build on this. Using transitional phrases will help you to convey to your readers how the sources relate to each other.

6. Can you carefully proofread for errors?