U WOULD TAkE BACK IF 'K>U COULDl A construction worker from the East: '''ielling this woman, nice girl, I loved her just to get what

<'! Everyone Is Talking About THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH What People Really Believe About Everything That Really Matters JAMES PATTERSON AND PETER KIM New VOl!. I Unt.!Ufl D'~i - IUhJlIlU ~ydllCy Tuk yo The QW-America Told the Truth "An extraordinarily exciting book-shoddng, informative, and disturbing in many of ita implications. A true speUbiDderl" -Nallwliellkanden. Ph.D. "Everybody talb about ethics but theBe two authon did lOIDething about iL The book is a winner." -Liz Carpenter, former White HoWIe spok.eapeaou.ledurer, and author of Gdting Better Al,,. Time "In milleDAia to come, students of our era will find invaluable insighta in this book into . what we really were as opposed to what we daimed to be. For todays reader, it provides that rMest and mOil disturbing of experienus: the truth." - John O'Tool~, praideRt, American AuociatioD of Advedising Agencies, Inc. "Fresh, fascinating, stimulating . Wbars new in Amerka in the '9Oe-and what endures-will fascinate anyone aHlCemed with aNIUIlunications in our nmon today; and should be required for those deeply concerned about our nation's future." -Rjdwd s. lWtJeU, director of MMbting Communication&, Eutman Kodak Company liVery revealing, nut eodly what many of us want to hear, but very believable. This resurch ,.hould serve as a challenge to all of us to tackle the problems disdosed and capitalize on the great strengths confirmed" -C. Aim MacDonald, presideDt & CEO, Nestlt Foods Corporation i , I 1"Patlenon'li a present-doay Polonius, helping ua to know ounelves in a rapidly changing world." -Mel Goodes, prePlent " CEO, Warner Lanlbert Com.,.oy HReader8 willleO raises fear and doubt, which oflen lead to depression: Did I do the right thing? Does it matter anymore? Does anything matter? Doubl comes with freedom as surely as ash follows fire. Americans in the 1990s haw more of both freedom and doubt-and of depression too than did any previous generation. In interview after interview, we saw men and women grappling with the cOl1l>equences of their new freedom to define their own moral codes: If no one I can trust is available to counsel me, how can I be sure thal what I'm doing is right? Is the other person-my lover, my business partner-playing by some set of reasonable rules? What are the rules't My rulcs't Their rules? No rules at all? 31 THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH 32 Americans wrestle with these questions in what often amounts to a moral vacuum. 'The religious figures and scriptures that gave us rules for so many centuries, the politiCal system that gave us our laws, all have lost their meaning in our moral imagination. Most Americans (83 percent) now look back to their parents' day as a time when people were more likely to be moral and as a time when people clearly knew the difference between right and wrong. In addition, we believe that our parents' generation was much more ethical than our own. \\'k see most moral issues in shades of gray, not in black and white as our parents did. \\'k'ye become wishy-washy as a nation. Some would say that we've lost our moral backbone. THE REAL MORAL AUTHORITY IN AMElICA 33 PERSONAL DOUBT As to their private lives, half of adult Americans said that they had been in situations that caused them to seriously doubt the morality of something that they had done or were thinking about doing. \\\\e asked those people to tell us about the events that bad caused those doubts. Their answers give us a unique insight iitto what actually troubles the moral conscience of Americans, what falls in the gray area between the clearly right and the clearly wrong. Did I Do the Rilhl ThinBll'm Not Sure. What follows is a sampling from our interviews that re\\'eals the difficulty people have in deciding what's right and what's wrong. "I fER STRONGLY EITHER WAY AIOUT THIS ISSUE" We ~5ked people if they see ~ 5t!t of currenl public issues ~5 being mor~lIy "gray" 01 ,., a5 dear case of right ~nd wrong: Issue Rights of criminals Affirmatiw iIClion Teat:hing Cre~tionl5m in schoob Premaritill sex The rllht to die ,.1 School busing Homosexuality Flag burning Pomography The death penally Homelessness ,.1 fighling poverty Alcohol abuse Women in the clergy Anti-Semitism ()M)rce Book banning The drug prublem Prayer in Khuols Birth control Communism Abortion ,., l'elcenUfe Who See Gt.y 57'" 54 52 52 .... .... 43 38 38 Petcenr.,e Who See I/i,ht .nd Wrona 43'" 46 48 48 5b 5b 57 62 62 63 37 35 33 65 33 67 31 69 70 30 29 28 fi1 71 n 27 27 26 73 73 73 74 25 75 27 A businesswoman from the Southwest. in her twenties, married. recalled: "I had sex with a stranger. \\Wy good sex, too. I changed my name to hide my real identity from him. I don't know what's really right or wrong in this age." A store manager from the Southwest, in her twenties. married: "Driving my car under the inftuence of drugs and alcohol. Also, sex with a stranger in a motel in S1. Petersburg. I guess they were both wrong things to do. I'm not sure." A \\'kst Coast sales clerk, in his twenties: "Because of my religious beliefs, I'm supposed to believe that having sex with someone of the same sex is wrong. "Et I do it frequently. What's frequently? Almost every day of my life. The guilt Is still there. though." It's the consequences of sex that severely troubled a teacher from the Midwest 1n her forties: "Advising my daughter to have an abortion led me into a long, suicidal siege. I'm not over it yet. I can picture a baby who never even existed." A woman from the Northwest, in her fifties, looked back to a time when she strayed during her first marriage: "My first husband was lazy and mentally abusive. 1 thought I was getting even when I strayed. 1 hurt myself more than him." And many American men look back in doubt on what they did in war: In Vietnam, I had very serious doubts if what I was doing was moral," said a ~st Coast post-office clerk, in his forties. "Right now, I have even worse doubts about it." A simUar thought process look back a retired manager from the 34 THE DAY AMUICA TOLD 'HE nUTH Northeast almost 50 years: "I wonder about the bombing I did during \\\\brld War II. TIle country said it had to be done. I'U go 10 my grave wondering if I'm a killer or not... SOUle pt.'opJe broke lhe lU~. or laws, for whal at the time lieemed a good reasou-al k:iUit to lhem: A banker from the Southeast, recalled: ". forged my mom's signature when il WiUi ~ ~. impol'laOt tOr me to do so. Otherwilie went to jail" Au adnUnililrator frona the EWit COilIil. in her twenUes, wasn't both ered about ciwatillg on a &n.d exam: ". had a copy of the exam with lbe au~wer& iu haud when 1 look it. Does it matler? Do exams really anatle..?" ".lit:d to Social Servicea Il1O J could feed my children. because their rub are uufair to while Americana," IHlid a Southwe~ern mother, divorced aud living atune. A yi,.c-preaJdent of a service company in the East: ". rationalize liteaiu." from OlY wmpany because they have iCrewed me royally. 'nley look thouliiUlds frolll me. I took lhouliIIKlti from tllt:m. Who's lia)" who'" dghl ur wrong? Nut them, lhal'" for sure." '0 Some 'old lies (or Idlll'ulhii uutold) to protecl others or themtidvcb: "Ilicu ilhuul my husband bcill" wiUucd by lhe law," said a church goi.n~ Nonbea6tem woman. "lliCLI Lo lbe police auu said I Willi driving, when my hUlilwld was arI'etiu~d lur OWl Idriying whOO intoxicaledJ. lie WiAS the aClual driver," said an office manager fronlth.: \\\\bl Coul, iu ht:r lwenUeti. A Noa'lhMStem WUllWl whu woeb Wi a &lure managt:I, illllt!1 t:4U"ly laftieb, a fCgulilr churchgoer,lMlid. "I eill out of Iuutie food_, et cetera, around tht: IIoton:. I'll opeu packages, bnack, tlJt:ll move Ull about auy busiue8s." A truck driver aduailh~d: ". was a hit-and-run driver. '10 lbib day, I don', know il'the pt:1Wll J hil Wi45 boldly hurt," What'!; right? Whal'& wrouK? W1Jt:n you are making up your own rult:b. your own moral t:udc..>fIi, it can make 11lt: world a confulOiuK place. Mobl An.cdcalllli arc Yt:r) cuutu~ ..boUl lht:ir pcrlllOual &nun":; ri~ht now. 4 --=====:- --~- -~-~- -~=-=~---:~~-~~~~===~----:=- = American Liars I low did we aclui&IJy gel the truth from people? l\\:ople lJciu~ iulerviewed knew lhat their answers and IiIOriea were anouymous aud liilfc. They cuuJd finally unburden Ibemtielvea and Bay what lIaey fell. IU m05t people, it Wil8 exhi1araUn,lO be lhemaelWII for a l.:haugc. Aud 'his calhartic process was probably dae onJy way we could have golleu at 'he trulla .uound the country. AmcdcilIllii lie. "Ilaey lie Inure than we had ever abougiat pclbIe before tbe study. &Il they auld us dae truth about how much &hey lie. JUSr AHOU'f EVERYONE UES-9J PERCENT OF ~ UE REOO 1..AIlLY. The majority or us find it hard to let lhrough a week without lying. Out: in live l.:an't make it through a single dtly-and we're llIIking aboul COUtiUOUS, pn:mt=(!ilalcd liai. In lact, the Wily IlODle peupIe talk ilhout U-Ylug do without belli, you'd tbink that lbey were smoken lryinK to '0 gel through il day without a Cigarette. When we relhun Iromlying, i" leu often because we think it's wrong (uuly 1:') percent) thau lor a variety of other reuons, anlong tbem t.be leal of IJClIIg L:ilught ( 17 fJCn:cut). 4S 46 THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH \\\\e lie to just about everyone. and the better we know someone. the likelier we are to have told them a serious lie. Of course there are white lies and trivial fibs. and the lies we tell to spare someone's feelings. Then there are serious falsehoods, and 36 percent of Americans. confess to telling that kind of dacker lie, which several people referred to as reallie5. We asked people to define what they meant by a serious lie. Their answers tell into four categories: Serious lies. they said, are those that hurt other people. Setious lies violate a trust. Serious lies involve crime or It:gal consequences. Serious lies are totally self-serving. are about who and what we are. masking the real truth. Everyone lies. but some people lie much more than others. WHO LIES THE MOST IN AMERICAl Men lie more than women. ~ullg men lie more than older men. Gays and bisexuals lie more than heterosexuals. Blacks lie more than whites. Catholics lie a bit more than Protestants. and both lie more than Jews. Unemployed people lie more than those with jobs. WHO TELLS THE MOST SEllOUS LIES" IN AMElICAI PRIVATE LIVES: ETHICS, VALUES, AND DILEMMAS 47 The poor lie more than the rich. Uberals lie more than conservatives. There is some good news about aU this lying: Lying is something we outgrow. (Or truth is a privilege of age.) In any ewnt, people lie less, in every age group, from eighteen to twenty-four on up through the decades. Those 65 and older lie less than half as much as those who are less than half their age. WHAT IS THE ONE LIE 'K>U WOULD TAkE BACK IF 'K>U COULDl A construction worker from the East: '''ielling this woman, nice girl, I loved her just to get what I wanted." A woman from the South who lives with her lover: "I told my mother I hated her-it was a lie. " A secretary in her fifties from the Southeast: "That I didn't do it-in school-with a teacher, when really I did." A man in his thirties from the East Coast, bisexual, married: "'leIling my mother I'm not a transvestite." "That my husband is not the father of our first child."-a WOOlan from the East Coast. in her forties. ..Jlow many men I had sex with before we mel There were a good dozen. And maybe a not-so-good dozen."-a woman from the East. who said that she has bt..oen faithful to her husband during their marriage. ". had a social disease and. later, she found out anyway."-a retired man from the Ealltt, who reported four aftilirs during his marriage. iI I "Men (40 percent) Vi. women (11 percent) " " " Homosexuals/bisexuals (52 percenl) vs. heterosexuals (31 percen!) BloJCks (51 percent) n. whites III percent) Catholics (36 percent) vs. Protestants (34 percent) Vi. Jews (25 percent) Unemployed (42 percent) vs. employed (34 percent) Liberals (37 percent) Vi. Conservativeli (29 percent) ill AlP=s l8-l4 (SO percent) Age~ 25-.... (34 percent) Ages 45-64 (29 per<.ent) Ages 65 and older (19 percen!) I\\:ople e.illrning less th.illn $10,UUO .iIInnu.illlly (49 percent) Vi. those milking $45,000 01 more III percent) iI I "Serious lie~ ilre lieltlill hUll people, ~Ie iI tru~l, have legil (oMequ*,nlI!S, or .rl! IOl.&lly iI iI IoeH,*,I\\'inll THE POWER Of A LIE "Lying is a wilY of pining "a-r owr other people through mmipul.illting them in vilrious ways. This is something that children Ie.illm. They .so learn to keep secrets. Sometimes secrets ilre deceptive, .iIInd sometimes they are not. If we are ITlt1ture, we have 10 unlearn any enjoyment of th.illt "a-r. "You have to know th.illt lhe "a-r Is there, and then you h.iIIYe to see If you can possibly live without it. Th.illt doesn't mean you never get into a situation where lying might be necessary but, on the whole, you try to Ie.illd your life so that you cummuniule with other people without Irying tu ITlt1nipulate them." -Si~SI!la Bok, philosopher 48 ill THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH PRIVATE LIVES: ETHICS, VALUES, AND DILEMMAS 49 ~ asked people about the most serious lie that had ever been told to WE LIE THE MOST TO THOSE WE LOVE them: AmeriQOs confess to ~ing regularly lied to the following: I'erson to Whom Liel Ate Told ill Puent friend Sibling Lover Spou~ ill ill Boss Child Best friend Co-worker NelBhbor Grandpuent Work subordinate OoctQr Accountant Clergyman Lawyer I'M:etIIIp 01 r.opIe Who tie 116% 75 73 73 69 61 S9 sa 56 49 47 4S 32 22 21 20 . AND THOSE WE LOVE UE 10 US Petson Who Lies to Us ill Friend Child Co-worker Sibling lover Spouse Parent Itl Itl Boss Work subordinate Best friend Neighbor Grandparent Lawyer Accountant Clergyman Doltor A man from the Northwest: 'That a child was mine and, three years later, it was proved he wasn't by a blood test." A woman from the Southeast: 'That my ex-husband wasn't having sex with my daughter. " A woman in her twenties from the Northeast: "My husband stole $1,000 from me and then bed. I found out the truth six months later." A man from the Midwest: "Being told my biological mother was dead, when she liYed a few blocks from me." A woman from the South: "My IIeCOnd husband told me he was not a gambler, never gambled. In fact, he was a compulsive gambler. What a pig!" As further confinnation of America's distrust of authority, 32 percent think that they've been lied to by a clergyman. The same applies to accountants (34 percent). And in the case of lawyers, people say it in spades: furty-two percent believe that they've been lied to by attorneys. I'eIRnu,e Who Alree 84"" 13 80 80 80 78 WHAT WE LfARNED ABOUT LIARS What are we to make of all of this lying? Here are some observations that we made, based on thousands of interviews: 7S n n 68 67 49 42 34 32 31 Most of our lies are relatively harmless. Most Americans are not trying to hurt other people with thm lies. Lying does empower many of us. It allows us to be people we aren't. It gives us the illusion of control. There are more seriuus liars right now (liars who do hann) than at any time in our nation's past. Inside many liars is an honest person trying to get out. In our interviews, we let some of those people out-for a day, anyway. Lying has become a cultural trait in America Lying is embedded in our national character. That hasn't really been understood around the worJd. Americillls lie about everything-and usually for no good reason. The majority of Americans today (two in every three) believe that there is nothing wrong with telling a lie. Only 31 percent of us belicve that hOllcsty is the best policy_ MEN AND WOMEN IN THE 19905 14 107 \\\\bmen still wonder, and worry whether a man can be sensitive and nol be a wimp. This is consistent in both rural and urban parIS of the country. WOMEN ARE THE MORAL SEX What Men Really Think About Women; What Women Really Think About Men; and the Real Truth About Both Ttll:: sexual revolution of the 19605 and 1910s has left American men and women of the 1990~ in Iitlparate world!;. nley stare at each other with indifference or, often, hObtility. What do men honesdy think about women? In OUI interviewb, it was t:Videllt dlat the majority of men btUl bet! women through the leub of traditional stereotypes. \\\\blllen art! St:C11 as pUltSycalb, 0 .. at least as catb; lheir Liulogy is their destmy; they nebt; they shop; they cry for no discernible reatiOn. Nonnan Mailer onl:e said, "You dOll't know anythiJlg ahuut a woman until you meet her in lmul." Sylwstel' Stallone has lx.>t:1I l4uutt..-d ab lohlying, .., have alJ the rCillOt)/l in the world to be a misogynist." What do women really think abuut men? \\\\Umen see men as predators; bullies; boys; the primary provider; even as meal tickets. Most women express some fear and COllcem about the pll~sical (or viujent) side or Ameril:du men. 106 One thing isn't contusing anymore, not to women, nor to men: \\\\bmen are the more moral sex. That's one of the only propositions that the two sexes absolutely agree on. \\\\bmen he less, steal less, fight less, do drugs less, are less often drunk on the road or on the job. \\\\bmen are more responsible, more loyal at work, more faithful in th~ir relationships. \\\\bmen make better citizens, bellel' team players. Yet it's still a man's world. Half of the men and two-thirds of the women said that men have the easier life. (On lhis issue, as on many othetB, blacks parted company with whites. Most blacks believe that women have it easier.) rorty-five percent of men say that their best friend is a woman. Only 31 percent of women find their best friend in a man. MalTiage has been an institution that supposedly protected women from the consequences of male tomcatting. As you might expect, women do not fully share the view that marriage is on the rocks. That marriage "till death do us part" is outdated, that the institution itself will be obsolete by the year 2000, that most marriages will end in divorce: These are all opinions held by some women but by many more men. On the other hand, the proposition that "parents have an obligation to stick it out in a bad marriage for the sake of the children" got the agn!emellt of 41 percent of the men vs. only 26 percent of women. WHAT WOMEN SAY ABOUT MEN IN THE POWDER ROOM \\\\\\! thought that it would be an interesting experience-for men c!>pedally--lo h~ar what some contemponuy women really say about tHen whclI they talk alllong themselvcs. The Sl:cne is an otlice IJuildillg in a metropolitan dty. The partiCipants arc all professional women, college graduates, with an interviewer. THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH 108 I iI iel WOMEN: THE HONEST SEX PEOI'LE WHO BL1EVE THAT IT'S ALL RIGHT TO LIE ... Why To protect oneself To avoid person.. emtJ.rrusment ie I To keep one's job To make oneteIf look better To gain a ramal! amqunt of money To get even with someone Women Men 52% 48 35 19 15 8 63~ 56 56 2& 25 16 FIOIlI Whom iel 2S 20 19 15 Bo5~ Neishbor Co-worker Clienllcuratomer Work subordinate Child iel 17% 11 6 7 8 10 10 9 J .AddicCioII iI Lil!d on ~ job application Burro~,J moll~y without repaying it Cheated on i'l(;ome t.xes ElWlSl\\er,ued un an insurance dlIim 20 8 23% 38 27 19 15 12 19 14% 32 18 32~ 26 12 ... 4 4 11 6 6 """,,,,,.," Men Wumtm .JO 27% 26 16 29 :lI 27 14 4J% 40 18% 19 5 ~e Gotten into a shoving match Challenged someone to a fight Gotten into a 'is,fight Hit someone with m object Sent someone to the hoipia.! Threatened someone with a knife Thre.tened someone with II Bun ~ut someone with II knife Shot someone with a Bun Men 3O'JI. 26 20 15 19 13 13 10 8 29 5 6 5 3 2 I'etcen~e WflpOn CMried knife Gun ... Women 61% 56 54 ... 1 30 35 Women WOMEN: THE GENTlER SEX iI 13 13 MM IIIept drugs Gambling Women Men WOMEN: TtiE LESS lARCENOUS ~X ~ 42~ SK 32 19 Alcohol WOMEN: BTTER WORKERS Itl Cheated on a test or exam ,..",.,. Who Ape MM ~ Who~ #'efCtml. ." *' The Ym( to get ahead is by politics, not by twd MH'k I expect to compromise values to get ahead The only w~ to get ahead is to cheat People Who Have Ever AcliWly 19 15 WOMEN: THE LESS ADDICTED SEX 2 7 Pilrticipated in unethical pctices lit work Took office supplies ill Lied 10 boss lied to coworker W.~ dlunk at work Uraed drugs at work leit work early without tefling lInyone Hlid an ai/air with a co-wmker Stole valuable company property Goofed uff at work 16 5 4 26 WOMEN: THE MORE DILIGENT AND PERSEVERING SEX 8eIieI 8 3 1 3 13 11 ill Lover iI l'etcenu,e Women Men Women Men 27% Store Pilnmt Str.nger Friend I Activily Shoplifted Used an ellpeOse account to entertain a personal friend Took a kickback or bribe iI PEOI'LE WHO HAVE STOLEN ... 109 MEN AND WOMEN IN THE 1990. Men 15~ 12 Women 4% 4 WOMEN: lHE MOKE SUSPICIOUS SEX AaMly . Searched spou~eJIover'5 wallet/purse Sretly gone through spouiellover's mall Lhe<:ked up on ,pouiellover's whereabouts htcen~ lien Women 34% 28 46 40 4S 56'" 110 THE DAY AMUICA TOLD THE TRUTH PelCent18e iI I Women 28 43 35 Se~rched child's room Questioned spousellover's friend Secretly gone through child's mail LilOtened in on spouseJlover's phone call Li~tened in on child's phone call Secretly fol"-d spousellover Secretly followed child iI iI Men Atliv;'y 42 23 38 19 17 22 18 28 25 22 16 MEN AND WOMEN IN THE 1990. 111 WOMAN #3: "Understanding." When you talk to a woman, she listens, and she hears what you're saying. Whereas, when you talk to a man, it's just what's there. You don't get any more. I think men do not hIM! the feel for the way our needs change. With a man, it's like being in a time warp. It's as if he's saying, "w,ut a second. '>U just got me bent all out of shape because you were crying. n And the woman says. "Ob, that's past. I've gotten rid of that" The man goes off and has a heart attack, and the woman has totally gotten it out of her system. ill WHAT WOMEN WD AIOUT MEN ACI05S AMERICA Things that women ~id to us about men: ANIMAlS WE ASSOCIATE WITH THi OPf'OSITE SO dumb they ~re ... they're not brain surpons, not _ the brain surgeons."-a youns saJeswomm from the wt, never muried, lives with her lover. o "I think Mick Jager had ~ rare insight: 'Men ~re busts of burdenl'''-a ~rried WOIniln from the East Coast. o "The best man, tmt r~re keeper, gives good check... -m EHI Coast woman, o "How ANIMALS MEN ASSOCIATE WITH WOMEN: AnirMI ill l'etcentl8e 01 Men 41"' 6 4 4 C~tIkitlen Dow/bird Deer/doe umblsheep ~rried hrcetl,.,e ill AnirMI 01 Women Dog 23% Pr~tor Illonlti~er) 21 8 GorilWapelmonkey Donkeylhorse Wolflfox Bull/ox Wetiells~kelr~t if 5 5 4 4 if INTEIlVIEWt:R: Please write down the first thing that popli into your mind when I say "women." WOMAN # 1: "Superior Race." I just think that women are baliically beller than men. I think that they're more interesting, more emotional, inwKhtful, have a lot more depth to their character, are more open, are more caring, are not that limited. They're emotionally more open than men, alld intere1iting and loving and limart. WOMAN #2: "(;rcat and imerebtillg." If I think about peuple I know and the people I care about, aud the people 1 think are bpeCial, I tcnd to have many more women than men who fall in that category. twice. "I think men hiwe a Ireat sense of fairness. If you keep everything on that ~sis, they respond very -'1,"_ psychologist from the West Coul, married. "How well can he perform'''_n educator from the South, in her flftIes, never married, lives alone. o "Tmt they can be Iyinl asshoIes."_ nlneteen-year-old laborer from the Midwest, never m~rried, IMls with ~ roommate. "Give me nice biceps. 1'\\1 jump on tmt myoid time."_ Wesl Coast widow in her late twenties. "Perverts, by and larse. They are ~H ~er one thing."_ mvried woman trom the Midwest. In her euly twenties. "Need ~ mother 10 tell them what to do. Sometimes, I like that too."_ West C~st budget assistant. in her thirties, married. o "How they are in bed and the size of their dick. For talk and companion ship, I've lot lots of girl friends."_ married wom~n from the Southwest, in her late thirties. o iI ANIMALS WOMEN ASSOCIATE WITH MEN: ill if The talk eventually turns to the real role of men in their lives: WOMAN # I: 1 don't have any friends that are men. I mean, it's about sex lor me. I lee! very fulfilled in all other areas. 1 really think I've built up a lite where I can almost function Without a man. WOMAN #2: I feel like I'm not valkJated without a male partner in some ways because I was brought up that wJ.y. You know, very strict, Catholic. Hut there's the other tiide of me that is completely validated withuut them. 1 do matter in this world Without a man. 112 THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH WOMAN #3: That's an issue that a lot of women feel the same about. I think you just said it. A lot of women in their late thirties who are not paired off with somebody have that exact feeling, like they feel very good and accepted in other aspects of their lives. WOMAN #2: Bul they're not validated. WOMAN #3: Yeah. WOMAN #4: It's like you have to take care of men. It's not two strong, equal individuals who are coming together at the same place. I feel like the woman is more intigrated and stronger and bas been through more. And then here comes this guy who has needs and speaks with a forked tongue and acts like he's liberated. But he's not liberated, and he doesn't really want you to be independent either. It's ... I don't know. I just think they're not as evolved. WOMAN #5: I think the only successful relationship I've ever had was with the first man who wasn't threatened by my career. And that's the man I married. WOMAN #6: Think about the times when you're away from home on business. I find that men are completely helpless when we're not around, and you see another side of them all of a sudden. He's like a very strong, macho man, who can do everything. And you go away on business for two weeks, and they fall apart. It's like they don" know what to do wilh themselves. WOMAN #5: 'abu know what else is interesting? When spouses die, almost within the year, men will hook up with somebody and remarry. I think they need a pilltnCI" no malter. I think women are much stronger and don't need to jump into the next relationship. WOMAN #6: Actually, a lot of widows become amazingly euphoric, even if they loved their husbands. WOMAN #4: See, I wish sometimes men could just act like women. WOMAN # 1: The whole idea that the man is supposed to be the strong person in the relationship and the provider, we're criticizing all of these things about guys-and then, on the other hand, when they're not that way, it'!> sometimes perceived as a lack of strength. INTi:RVIl-:WER: 'That's a point. A lot of women I know break up relation ships if the guy's wimpy. WOMAN #2: So we're saying, "Why can't they be more like women?" \\\\bmen an: unden;tandin~, women arc emotional. women are vulnerable. Then, when we find men like that, we don't WolDt them. WOMAN #4: I used to ha\\'e male mends, but they're never as good as female friends. WUMAN #2: AU my male liicnds arc gay. INTl-:RVII-.WER: Wheu II)ClY lhe word "mcn," write down a word. MEN AND WOMEN IN THE 19901 .. tr .. 113 "MOMMY" "I love intelligent women. I love to go home md talk to women who want to talk about politics or birth control or, God forbid, baseball. forty years ap, my mother didn't go to college, she didn't go to high school. She was one-dimen sional, raised the kids. And one night, the night my father died, I stayed up until five o'clock in the morning with our two friends, drinldna beer with my mother, which I had never done in my life. And I found out that here was a woman that WiS incredibly talented, an incredible brain. I thought of her as Mommy. Then, aU of a sudden, she's telling me she listens to Itzhak Perlmvl and all these things when my father wasn't in the house, because he felt threatened that she liked something he didn't understand completely. And I think that was very typical of that generation. And what a damn sNme. And it's too bad we don't spend more time understanding who women really are, and they don't do the same really finding out about who we are." -Man, in his Nte forties, white, fu'll sit and you'll spend two hours having dinner with them, and they'll tell you everything about themsel\\'es. And they won't ask a thing about you. I don't think the key to a mau'l> heart is through his stomach. It's through your ears. Because llhink that men will fall in love wuh you if you're a great listener. INlt:RVIEWER: What would you say is the greatest area of conflict between men and women? WUMAN #4: Control. Who's going to sit in the driver's seal WHAT MEN SAY ABOUT WOMEN IN THE LOCKER ROOM The participants now are all professional men, friends, drinking bud dies. I Jere are the kinds of' things men say about women over a few beers. INT~RVIEWER: Just teU us the farst word that pops into your mind when you think of women. MAN III: "l':rratic." My mother was erratic. My sister's err-me. I think nne uf Illy duwnlalls is uupn:dil:lablc and erratic women. MAN #"2: "\\Uluptuous. II 114 THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH MAN #3: "Ambivalence." \\\\bmen have two personalities-modern-day women anyway, the ones I deal with. They have this necessity to prove themse!vt:s in the business world, or to prove themselves the equivalent of men on a lot of levels. But underneath it all. there's this driving desire to make a nest. So paIt of them is constantly fighting. ~ can meet the most qualified woman intellectual, and underneath that, when you scratch the surface, you lind SOIlleone who wants to build a nest. MAN #2: I think when a girl is coming up the street, men look at her tits. Nobody looks at &heir minds. And that's all they say: "What's the matter? Why don't you look. at my mind?" INTli:R~Ili:WER: Which sex has a better fix on the needs and priorities of the oth~r sex? MAN #-1: \\\\Vmen are more perceptive about life in general. Plus they spend much more time thinking about certain things than men do. Men are in buliiness doing this or that. \\\\bmen have more time to do it. They spend half their life doing that. MAN #3: People came in and made women aware that they had brains and tha'e was something better in life than just raising children. \\\\ell, that may be right and may be wrong. But it still goes against everything in nature. INTERVIEWER: What do you think are the ground rules today? MAN ;;3: I belieYe tllere are new ground rules. 1don't quite unde[t;land them, and that's why I stay wilhout a relationship. MAN #2: I think there are instincts deep down with women, MAN # 1: They're unlJelievabJe. MAN #2: \\\\bmen tlUllk-no, they Imow-we're providers. MAN #-1: The need to have a lJaby is unbeliev-olble. TIley have no control over it. Something inside them is saying, "\\bu got to reproduce. 'lUu have only so many more years. Reproduce! Reproduce!" MAN # 1: \\\\bmen are captives of their bodies. MAN #2: Of course they ate. MAN #4: It'l get married again (I got married twice) 1 wouldn't marry a woman that works. I don't want to get involwd with women that work. It intericres with life. I like to play a lot of golf on weekends. And if you can't hack that, don't get involved with me. That's my opinion. IrHUtV1EWf.tl: Do you think it was better the way it was, when women stayed home? MAN 112: \\\\bmen ar!!n't dedicated to business the way men are. 111ey come in at nine, they work until five. In my opinion, I think thal, basically. they're looking lOr a husband. They're not going to go and !;UplJOll the family--,at !caslllOl if tlwy have a choice, MAN # 1: I ieel a ll'cmenduus amount of cOII,'ulSion in my gcncration. MEN AND WOMEN IN THE 19901 115 MAN #3: I think women have more difficulty dealing with men's idiosyncrasies than men do dealing with women's idiosyncrasies. INTERVIEWER: Are women more honest than men? MAN #5: I think they are, yeah. They think they're more honest, see. They blurt out stuff that we can't understand. MAN #4: One pussy hair has got more power than a church full of saint!). I wish I could say it in Italian. That's women's power and their strcngth. That's the only way they can control the male. ONE CONCWSION A bad altitude exists right now between American men and women. TIlis attitude is conUibuting to the problem between the sexes. A majority of men believe that women expect men to undel8tand women's emerging needs but that women aren't willing to reciprocate with men. They don't try to understand the problems of being a man. Men feel that the situation has become completely unfair and weighted against them. "Men die earlier," one man said. "and I don't think women have stopped to think about why that's so. Most men have the pressure of responsibility thrust on them, and it goes from cradle to early grave." Thi!) bitterness is widespread, and it rum deep among the men we talked to. It surfaced in interview after interview, when men began to talk about what they really think and belie\\'e. It's creating a counter trcnd tuward the past: the old TBtA (tits and ass) syndrome is returning. It also hilt; the potential to spawn a rtM>lution among men-a men's movement. \\\\Umen have changed during the past couple of decades; that is clear from our interviews. w'men are more confident about tllemsehes, more outspoken, much more involved in the work force. 1be previous docu mentation of this a(;curately matches our data: W,men's superiority in moral!; and ethics, while suspected by some, is o\\'elWhelming. The rhetoric or the women's movement, however, seems to have helped to l:reate caricatures of men, stereotyping, and bigotry. Alleast, it came up often in our interviews. As necessary as this stereotyping may have been as a catalyst 10 change, it bas now become another obstacle to Il!l:ondliation bet ween the IieXe8. Hut stereotyping is happening with both sexes right now. Most men and women seem to have little experience that results in an understand ing uf the oppotOite sex. Their views are largely shaped by myth and word (If IIlCluth frolll I'licnds. Listening to American men talk about women is like h~Lellill~ to them talk alxJUt world VOUtics. They know very little, but .'. 116 iI tI THE DAY AMfllCA TOLD THE nUTH WHAI MEN ACIOSS AMOICA SAID AIOUT ~N "They'.e In!ed)" 1e5M!f peopIe."~ deipr from &he We~t C~t, in hi~ Ihiniei, newf ........ itId. "Mt!n oUtI ~,io.r 10 WOIIltIn. The proof is ewrywhere. Who runs the world'''---an t.ro& eu..t nloUl, in hi.l~le thirties, 1IW',id. "They Kt Met drew lUG much like men, ret they pick up lhe chk."-in E CuMI mnwnne" in hil Menliel, A_r m,mied, liveli , alone. "Sure, WOr1WII IlKced Ihe j~.,., bul at leilil men made an clio,. to under sund whitlhear neeldi .re. Wonwn .t..cotype men iInd no effort tu Undef5tilnd."-40 E eo.ul wklwnan. IIW'ried. ... "They're a hull. pain in !he "$ bul nice 10 Iwve around. -an unemployed min from ..., t ..., in hili Ihirlifi, dillUfced. "They e only "uod 11K one thinS; two, if $he an cook."~ Soulheln cop, in his fortie., ",.,ried. o "T~I they ... :.urry bitches iInd only lood 'or one thing."-il Midwestern Wllldltr, lwetlliclt, IMMtr married. ". know why m)' like;; modern dinee. I love il lhat .he doe. She', made no di~1I Iv urWt:.liund why ltuve the thinp I du."..; Ioiwyef 'rURI the South. "TheY'fll COWVlt. Yuu willk intu Mly kMarI in &he counlly, you'lI ..e nothinl bUI LOWI, Isu.fotnle. il."-.", It.ilion OWVRer 'rurn abe MidM:ltl. "This _'I ~uund velY elllishilmlld uf me, bul ii', Kc.:ur.le. When ~ man m~'rle~ a WOIfI"", two thing' ~n; One, lhe wom.1Il c.:hinKelt; two, ~hll Irio!l 10 dl4l1~ yuu. AllllUltt 1111 Ill." will diwK,t:e with Itwl."-il mltd;, newe, .nak. II iI wi'. iI tI dtA:tOl OR &/11: Weltl C.,.)l. what Ihcy know. lhey'l'c ;adamant about. \\\\bmen uncn tlllk about mcn Wilh Ill&.! saUte lack uf real uudcn~talldillg. Aud "aey'r.: iu'h:xilJlc about llitlir views ill> wcU. lu iutcrvicw ailer illterview. bulh :;CXCIt werc cu trcndacd in lhei.r ~c..cutyfltlb and prcjudiccb ahoul the wher sex. Ahuu:;l hlllf uf alll11cu dUlik uf WUUM:ll ab IJUtllllli. AJiuu:.1 half of .ill \\~UlUcu lhiuk ul' meu a:. dO"b ur pn.'.tIatocb. 147 WORK 21 Modern American Business: Greed at the Top own actions, their own morality, is even lower than the one their workers have of them. In addition, modem American managers show little loyalty to their companies, to their workers, or to the public that buys those products. American workers reply with absenteeism, petty theft, indifference, and a generally poor performance on the job. The American business system often creaks and grinds to a halt, and it's the ,Japanese or Europeans who get the next order. The syndrome has gotten worse every year of the past decade. Let's start at the top and see why. THE BOSSES FUmier NCAA chanlpionship basketball coach AI McGuire once 0b served, ". think the world is run by C students." McGuire has pretty high standards, and he keeps being disappointed by the leaders he meets. The consensus is that our business executives are enrtching them selves beyond any kind of acceptable level, while impoverishing America. As a direct consequence, there is no loyalty in many companies. The very idea iii scorned: "You want loyalty? Hire a cocker spaniel'" one of our iDlerviewees told us. Other thoughts we heard: Much has been written on the loss of world market share by American businesses and why we can't seem to compete the way we used to. According to thousands of workers and bosses, one very important and underestimated reason is clear: The perceived low ethics of management is a major cause of our problems in the business world. Greed in American management is out of control. Never have !iO many taken su much, right otl" the top. "GM isn't what it was, and they were never all that great to us. "-a GM worker. '1'here used to be a sense of family around here-not since the buyout."-a General Rxxts manager. "You want to be loyal, you wdnt to belong to something better than It "Tht! income gap between American and Japanese busine55 executiws is astound ing. . . . There is no w~ that 101 Japanese executive) coutd expect to equal the luxuries enjoyed by American eXKutiYes. Mr. Matushita, probably the wealthiest It I THl ROUIU WITH IUSINISS TOOoW "The trouble with the rat race is tNt ewn if you win. you're ilill a r."" It -lily Jumlin When we asked about their business ethics, American executives pointed a shaking finger of guilt-at themselves. 'Illey know that they're doing wrong. The managerli' viewli of their 146 AMEllCA AND JAPAN: THf D1FFUENCE IN UKUTIVE PlIVILEGE nwn in j.lpan, when traveling abroad with his secretary, uses regular commerciill llighb. HiVing .. private pWle is simply out 0' his realm 0' consideration. ",An Americanl corporate chairman with whom I am acquainted complained thaI he has no use for all the money he receiws. His company is doing well, and his income is in the muhi-million-dollar-a-year range. His children ;are all,rown, .1Ild he ..nd his wife already hiVe ViKation villas, a yacht, and .. private airplane. Ue ~id they just have no w~ to spend any more money on themselves." -Akio MDril~, Chilirm.llll of Sony Corporation It 148 THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH yourself, but they make it impossible. "-a Shearson Lehman execu tive. "Everybody is for themselves now. Nobody's for First National Bank."-a First National Bank of Chicago employee. "They lie to us ev~ry single day. "-a ronner Ykndy's employee. ".Jameli Brown it; in jail while Ross Johnson walks free. Something's wrong here. "-a tunner RJR worker, a black woman. 1 Re~ To/al DolIN Pad.age ., ComfWlY kKLe~";n8 John M. Richman, Vice-Chair,.,.n ., TEN \\,a:RY LARGE GOlDlN PARACHUTES NiIme MId Tirle Philip Morris Control Data Cimpbell Soup Cineplex Odeon Dow Chemical Retired Resigned Resigned Resigned Resigned Resigned Resigned Resigned Resigned Resigned 5,400,000 4,500,000 A NEW YOIUC EXfCUTIVE TELLS HOW THE SYSTEM \\\\OIlS "Not every but too many senior executives hiM! their price. That's why there are these exorbitant salaries at the top of a lot of companies. We won't admit It, not even to ourselves, but we'lIt! been boupt. If we deliver profits, at almost any cost, then we set ludicrous bonuses--millions of dollars. "This is how the system works and it's repeated in most companies: Money Is put on the table fof lop executiw!s, especiIUy the top dot- A lot of money. Enough money to make it impossible for the exewtille not to do what Is 'necessary.' Let's yY it's $15 mU110n if the numbers are ~"I jf they aren't. That kind 01 money can cause someone to rationalize a lot of decisions, especially when it comes to cutbacb. In a sense, the bi8 money packaaes create a conflict of interest for the executive: '00 I do the right thins by my peopIel Or by the bottom line (Including my bottom line)l' An incredible amount of ration alizing goes on. 'This is for the good of the company; it has noth"" to do with my $15 million.' That kind of interior dlalosue. "I'd like to say I could rationalize what l'lIt! done in terms of people in my own company. I can't. I was bought." -Man in hI5 mid-Iorties, white, _ned, urns .ax- $5IID,IIOO it year plus bonuses. 5,800,000 Squibb Cineplex <>deon Kellogg Imperial Corp. $22,400,000 13,500,000 W.R. Grace 149 WORK Robert M. Price, CEO R. Gordon McGovern, CEO G4lrth H. Drabinsky, CEO Joseph G. Temple, ExKulive Vite-President Terrence D. Daniels, ViceCh.tirman Jan Lo:!schly, President Myron I. Gottlieb, Vice-Chairman Horst W. Schroeder, Pre)ident Kenneth J. Thyger)on, Chairman SouK"; BU5ineu Wee,\\;. 11,100,000 7,400,000 &,500,000 ill lOSSES vs. WOUfIS ~of 3,800,000 Question 2,bOO,000 Who works harderl Workers ~y 7, 19'JO 1 Several workers told us about the unethical things they'd actually seen executives do. The misc.leeds 1II0l;t often wimessed: intimidating and threateniug employt..-es; violating job safety standards; discriminating against Wacks, Hbpanks, or Asians; discliminali.llg against WOllltm; sexually l....rassing womeu; oven criminal actions; making products that endange. lives. On w..U Street and ill HoUywood, two places where the sharks are especially thick, there's .1 common feeling that the younger carnivores are even more voradous than their elders. "It's like Lord oJ tile Flies, with the yuppies in middle management," said one husinessmall we spoke to. It's emotiouaUy draillillgjustto LOUIe to work illlhe morning." The movie busilless wali never particularly noloo lor its business morality. But .Jere IJcllshaw. a produl:cr who's bt!cn around for thirty years, tuld the to:> Allyt"it:!) Time!) that the new breed of lloUywuc.x.I ., ~n~gers Who is more ethicall Workers Managers Who i~ more greedyl Workers Manclgers Who is more trustworthy I Workers ~n~8er5 .1 Who takes credit for another's workl Workers ~nagers ., Who cares mosH Workers Molllagers MatYam Who -"11ft ~of Wottm Who-"llft 43'" 31 ~ 37 37 19 13 18 10 15 61 53 32 ..0 14 14 18 50 2& 29 23 51 41 24 ,., 150 THE DAY AMERICA TOll> 1 HE nUTH executi~ has tumed the perwuaJ ,rUtillhal ulied to govern d~aI-making into a joke, "The older hands g~t dePl'etibed," IJemJUlw said, "Ther~'s a lack of moriility ...uong the ),uuugt:r SCl. L~illg 1).1110 lJecuna.: il WiAY uflUe. What's fruSll',lliug is that I dUll" ~ any uWilziw'aWe rt:waN fur hOllt.'St), or fortlulghulCSS, .. ~. ." ETHICS: Ull ",)lkt.~' Iltl'OlT Thint percenl oi Alnt:1 h:iln \\WI kim. wr II.... Iht:il enlf*Jyel ellg~e~ ill oAt 1,,41 one u, Ihe 'oIlowins "iIllJ~ ul un"lhkoll Alivilie,,; ""'''&'' hie ul "'''I\\'",i,''a ~""r Inlimw.les oImJ 111I".aI.,II" enlplu)'ec~ regul...1y VioI.le job wiel)' 1......... 1.1. OiSt li...in~es "Iain!>1 I bI.al.k~, I th"oIniu., 01 ~UII" (liM. fllninile" "lIain~ """~II 01 >cll...alI)' h.., ..~C,. diem Ln",1iC' in nimill.al alli~ihal~ ..uke,. prodLK:b Ih.l e"ll.&lIlI':' hUAloIIi live,; .. I~i"" 11 II 5 .. I IIUSINtSSfUUO IN lilt Nt ws ---_._------ -------------- ~usille"~ stori", It.." Ih,,~e .al" ~u \\.UllullUlifJl.ale t...J.a) It loll tlK:)' ullt:n dOl... ellCIi ....... c the "UlII " ..ge ul "UlII""'p~I': "lhe Gene.'" EI"'-IIK. Cl.lllliWlt), wtlll.h w~ 1.1.Il1vil.l~ in .. jury 1II.II.I'I.Ivcn I""H' ... It inl Ih... Army lUI Lwuld.dd """'pule' ~)~Ielll ...1I.e" )'e,leld." Iu JloI), une til lhe 1.1l1e1~t fint!~ e>t!f ")~t!l>!oc" 1<11 ljelroaudillll,he i)elc..... ucp.ulmcili. t,. 1. \\\\,111 p"y ~11>.1 millioH III uilll"'.! 0111". ivit '~Iwllie). "lhe Norllul.lp l:or"ul.liun oIwe~ lu IJol) $1711l1l1iun 'u, 1.aI,ilyillK Ito" dollol un UJrnlklflenb 01 11M: (1U1~eI lIIis,jlto .ntllhe 1i0l1lK:1 ~I, the 1.I'lIl')1 fI .."loIIY I100u.1 ~"IlI"lIIelll WoA~ 'coAlh".' ill I~. wh.!11 Ihe ~wMhlroHtd l.I.IIPOI",I"'1I IUI<.I ) ..; mil/lUll 'Uf l.I~cllHlhllg Ihc 1)Vl'III,"CIIII.., nll'n",,) t""~"fe." ./IM!" hHi ,,,",,,, lui) !t, 1'rAJ 155 WORK 22 American Workers Get to Tell the Truth THE TRUTH AS WORKERS SEE IT The so-called Protestant ethic is long gone from today's American workplace. W>rkers around America frankly admit that they spend more than 20 percent (7 hours a week) of their lime at work. totally goofing off. That amounts to a foor-day work week across the nation. Almost half of us admit to chronic malingering, caBing in sick when we are not sick. and doing it regularly. One in six Americans regularly drink or use drugs on the job. Only one in four give work their best effort; only one in four work to realize their human potential rather than merely to keep the wolf from the door. But then, why should we? After all. half of us genuinely belieYe that you get ahead not through hard work but through politics and cheating. About one in four expect to compromise their personal beliefs in order to get ahead on their current job. CAN'T GET NO SATISfACTION Only one in ten say that they are satisfied with their jobs. Only three in len Americans tMly tbat they are loyal to their companies. ill IV REGION: MODliN AMERICAN WOUfI5 (For a map of Ameriu's reSions, see Part I.) VERY SATISFIED WITH JOB (National Average: 20%) Re,ion Here is the quid pro quo ill the American workplace today. American workers are as disloyal to their jobs as their bosses and compauies are perceived to be disJoyalto Ulem. Over their life span, Ule averaKe American worker will spend 76,900 hours on UJe job. That's a big part of their liveli-hy far the biggest waking activity. But to heal" person after person tell it, Americans make poor use of thot>e working hoon;. Q: How many people work in your office? A: Ahout half of them. That uld joke hm', far frum the truth in lhe 1990s. 154 ii' M.ulboro Country Old Dixie Granary L.A.-Mex Rust Belt ill I'e~ 35'" 33 2S 22 19 llegion New South Pac Rim Metropolis NewEnstand ~!*fe 19% 18 17 12 PUT TOTAL EFFORT INTO JOB (National Awerase: 45%) Re&iOll Marlboro Country New South Granary l.A.-Mel( ill Ku~t 8elt ~e 65% 52 .q 46 45 Resion Metropolis Old Dillie Pac Rim New Enstand l'ettenu,e 43% 40 39 27 156 THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH Americans are happiest and do their best at work in Marlboro Country. New England is at the opposite pole: Its residents admit that they are the least satisfied with their jobs and the least willing to give work their total effort. Few of us are willing to put the public interest above our pocketbooks. Most people told us that they would quit their jobs before they would take a pay cut so that the following problems could be fixed: DiSCrimination against women, blacks, or Hispanics ProduLtion of products that endanger human lives Prevelltion of employee layoffs without sufficient notice Pollutiull of the environment The reason they would quit is key: Americans don't trust the managers who make these financial decisions, supposedly for the common good. They believe that managel"S make decisions with only their own interests at heart. Why then should workers be the ones to sacrifice? Many American workers say that they cannot trust their co-workers (43 perceut) or subordinates (38 percent) in the cunent business envi ronment. Maybe it isn't surprising when you listen to what people say about their jobs. WHAT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT THEIR WORK In the boardroom. "\\\\e were all millionaires, yet we thought it compassionate that we took no bonus at a time when thOUsandlli were being fired in our compauy. That's how out of touch we'd become." Stealing. "Our night manager steals from the company nightly. \\\\e caD him The Burglar." "Everybody steals supplies out of the warehouse." "Co-workers take money out of the cash regititer," "My boss has taken money and giveu mercha.ndise aW'tly." liDg. "Bosses often ask someone to say a job's done when we haven't even started." "'There's constaut lying to clients about completion of quotas," "We all lie to clients, everyone of us, to everyone of our clients." Cheating. "Cheating people out of pay." "Leaving work without fin ishing the job." "Shameful misuse of company materials and company time." "Cuver-ups for jobs not done." "Hdsification of a lot of ~i~u-in sheets which gel billed." Sex. "Secret meetings in the closet. ... My girl friend is botling the boss durill~ lunch." "Employees loving each other in the store alter we close." "Sexual harassment by our gay bosli. He hits on the men ill his departmeul. " 157 WORK It It THE lOP fiVE OFfICE CRIMES 1. 2. 3. 4. S. Takins office supplies and equipment LyinS to a boss or co-worker 5tealins company funds Affair with a boss or co-worker TakinS credit for work not done Doctoring document "Falsified reports." "Shady accounting." "Signing someone else's name." "Altering of many official recorda," "Signing by other people, not the applicant." "Using false company names." "People falsifying forms for leave." "Incorrect work turned in to fiU quotas. Everything we do down in South America!" OFFICE CRIME It's not surprising that we see so many locked doors or that companies are turning to what's called "integrity testing" in rising numbers. These are tests (not including lie detectors, which are banned by law) that are given to job applicants in an effort to screen out would-be tbiew:s. This kind of business testing is growing by more than 20 percent a year. Super D Drugs, a chain in the Southeast, turned to integrity testing after a dramatic rise in what they called "shrinkage." The company's Vic:e-President for Loss Prevention said that the tests are already saving $400,000 in stolen goods. The New South, where Super D Drugs operates, ranks second only to Metropolis in its rate of unethical employees. Old Dixie is close behind those two. You don't have to bolt the door quite so tightly in New England and Marlboro Country, where workers' ethics are strongest. The Case for Hirinl Women O\\ country simply behave more ethically than men. On every question we probed, American women in the workplace held to a higher moral standard than men did. 158 .. .. THE DAY AMERICA TOLD THE TRUTH IOSSlS AND WORKERS: THE GlOWING GAP MBelWeen 1981 and 1969, the net worth of the Forbes 400 richest Americans narly lripled. Corporate executives also made strides in this area. In 19110, corporate Chief Exec:utive Officers made roughly forty times the income 01 iM!raae 'iCtory workers. 8y 1919, CEO, _re makin, 93 time, ill much." -kvln Po PhIllips, aulhor The I'oIiIia 01 aIch MId Poor. We.1hh MId the Ametian aectorite in the ItuBMllJtemlillh 0' Most women-but only a minority of men-are loyal to the company that pays them (60 percent vs. 46 percent). Less than half as many women as men believe that the only way to get ahead is to cheat, and not as many believe in politics rather than work as the way to success. In addition, women are much less willing to compromise their values to get ahead and somewhat more willing to quit as a matter of principie if they learn that their company is engaging in illegal activities. I.ook for the ~ In their on-the-job behavior, women are less likely, usually by pretty big margins, to take office supplies home, to malinger, to lie to bosses and co-workers, tu leave early, or lO goof off. Management is much less likely to find a woman drunk at work or on drugs. If valuable company property is stolen, the thief will be a man six times in seven. At work, as in private life, women set a higher standard of ethics. 159 WORK * * WHAT MIDDLE CLASS KIDS MISS: THE lOY Of GIVING "One of Ihe most incredible things to me, really, is to see the typical middle class kid who'. given everything he wants, except the privilege 01 service, the privilege of 5elf-5oKrifice, and the joy of being a giver. We've become a pa5sive soc:iety that iees everything in terms 01 our open mout~fill it with something I The idea that we can actually do things for something broader__ community-i$ lost. " -Willard Wylin, bioelhicist Someone doing business with these high-school seniors is well-advised to get paid in advance: "Do you think that a company which is going bankrupt has a moral obligation to repay its debt?" "Yes," said 56 percent of business execu tives. "No," said a larger majority (62 pt!rcent) of the senion. Similarly, almost all of the adults "would replace a faulty product made by Ilhdl'} finn even if under no legal obligation to do so." Fewer of the seniors would do the right thing if they weren't under the gun of the law. The kids on lying and cheating in business? They were twice as willing as the adults were to do one or the other in the course of business. \\\\buld you "consider lying to achieve an important business objective of lhe firm'!" "Yes," said two-thirds (66 percent) of the seniors vs. less than one-third (29 percent) of the adult executives. "U a building is damaged by a stOlm, (would you) include all damages covered by insurance, even though not caused by stoml?" "Yes," said half of the seniors vs. one-quarter (26 percent) of the grown-ups. THE 'lICE Of SUCCESS AMERICA'S BUSINESS FUTURE High-school seniors proved even more cynica