1. Draw the person out. Shneidman advises framing questions such as “What’s going on?” “Where do you hurt?” or “What would you like to see happen?” (Shneidman, 1985, p. 11).

Such questions may prompt people to verbalize thwarted psychological needs and offer some relief. They also grant you the time to appraise the risk and contemplate your next move. Imagine yourself having an intimate conversation with a close campus friend, Chris. You know that things have not been good.

Chris’s grandfather died six weeks ago, and the two had been very close. Chris’s grades have been going downhill, and Chris’s romantic relationship also seems to be coming apart at the seams. Still, you are unprepared when Chris says very deliberately,

“I just can’t take it anymore. Life is just too painful. I don’t feel like I want to live anymore. I’ve decided that the only thing I can do is to kill myself.”

When somebody discloses that he or she is contemplating suicide, you may feel bewildered and frightened, as if a great burden has been placed on your shoulders. It has been. If someone confides suicidal thoughts to you, your goal should be to persuade him or her to see a professional, or to get the advice of a professional yourself as soon as you can.