The following claim letter lodges a strong, almost insulting complaint, but the writer does little to persuade the receiver to meet his demands. Can you administer a radical rewrite that might make the request more successful?

Your Task. Analyze this poorly written claim letter, and list at least five weaknesses. If your instructor directs, revise it.
Current date
Mr. Trenton Khalifa
VIP Copier Specialists
1532 Nashville Pike
Gallatin, TN 37012
Dear Ripoff Specialist:

Here are the dismal facts. My company recently purchased four of your BizStar C500 photocopiers, which sounded great at the time. They promised 2-sided copies, fax, printer, and color scanning to my computer. This was perfect for my health care office. Your salesperson Carol Finley assured us that the BizStar C500 could handle our high volume of 3,000 copies a day. This sounded unlikely since the sales brochure suggested that the C500 was meant for 500 copies a day. Regardless, we listened to what Ms. Finley told us. And that was our big mistake! Our four C500 copiers are down every day, and my employees are screaming at me constantly. These machines are still under warranty, and I will admit that they do eventually get repaired. However, we can't get by with so much downtime.

Because I lost faith in your Ms. Finley, I telephoned the district manager, William Yamaguchi. I suggested that we trade in our four BizStar C500 copiers (which cost us $2,300 each) for two BizStar C1000 models (at $12,500 each). However, Mr. Yamaguchi said he would have to charge 50 percent depreciation on our C500 copiers. What a major rip-off! I think that 20 percent depreciation is more reasonable since we've had the machines only three months. Ms. Finley said she would get back to me, and I haven't heard from her since.

Now I'm forced to write to your headquarters because I have had no luck with either Ms. Finley or Mr. Yamaguchi, and I need to see some action on these machines. If you understood anything about business, you would see what a sweet deal I'm offering you. I'm willing to stick with your company and purchase your most expensive model-but I can't take such a steep loss on the C500 copiers. These copiers are relatively new; you should be able to sell them with no trouble. And think of all the money you will save by not having your repair technicians making constant trips to service our underpowered BizStar C500 copiers! Please let me hear from you immediately, or I may next turn to Yelp.

Sincerely yours,

List at least five weaknesses.