Message Strategies: Writing Condolence Messages

[LO-4] You’ve been working two years as administrative assistant to Ron Glover, vice president of global workforce diversity at IBM’s Learning Center in Armonk, New York. After listening to many of his speeches on maintaining multicultural sensitivity in the workplace, you know you’re facing a sensitive situation right now.

The husband of your coworker Chana Panichpapiboon was killed in a bus accident yesterday, along with 19 others. The bus skidded on icy pavement into a deep ravine, tipping over and crushing the occupants before rescue workers could get to them.

You met her husband, Surin, last year at a company banquet. You can still picture his warm smile and the easy way he joked with you and others, even though you were complete strangers to him. He was only 32 years old, and he left Chana with two children, a 12-year-old boy, Arsa, and a 10-year-old girl, Veera.

Use the following questions to help you think through your choices before you begin writing:

a. Which of the following sentences would make the best opening?

1. I am sorry for your loss.

2. What a terrible tragedy you have suffered.

3. I was crushed by the horrible news about your husband.

4. You and your children must be so upset, and who could blame you?

b. In the body of the letter, you want to express something meaningful, but you are not familiar with Chana’s religious beliefs, and you’re not sure what’s safe. Choose the best idea from the following:

1. You could include a poetic quotation that doesn’t mention any particular religion.

2. You could express your deep sorrow for Chana’s children.

3. You could mention something positive about Surin you learned during your brief meeting.

4. You could ask her close friends at work about her religious preferences and then do some research to come up with something appropriate to say.

c. For your closing paragraph, which of these ideas is best?

1. Take a moment to express your thoughts about death and the hereafter.

2. Say that you are thinking of her during this difficult period and invite her to call if you or the company can assist her in any way.
3. Explain that you don’t understand her religious beliefs and aren’t sure what’s appropriate to say at this time.
4. Any of the above.

d. In the following list, identify all the phrases you should avoid as you write:
1. Life is for the living 2. I am sorry for your loss 3. Karma 4. Unbearable pain Now write the condolence letter in your own words, using the advice from the chapter.