CALLERS EMERGENCY PHONE AND CRISIS COUNSELING San Francisco's Golden Gate Bridge has the second-highest rate of suicidal jumps in the world. By Tasha L. Todd very day on our 9-1-1 journey is different. Times are changing constantly. The topics of our training classes and sessions are in constant flux to meet our changing needs. One training subject that has evolved over the years is the han- dling of suicidal callers. In today's world, discussion about the topic of mental illness has become more open than at any other time. PSC September/October 2016 25 25 Celebrities, politicians and civic leaders have given mental illness a voice where long there has been silence. Because of this, it has changed how we as telecommu- nicators have trained for these 9-1-1 calls. You would be hard pressed to attend any public safety conference at which there is not at least one session offered on suicidal callers. This training makes us better able to handle those situations when they occur. There are two instances during my 19 years in 9-1-1 in which my training and my ability to handle a suicidal caller were tested. The first came early in my career. I was young, eager and had the world by the tail. I studied hard and fast, and I quickly moved into the rank of Communications Training Officer (CTO). It was a quiet (yes, I said it) Wednesday morning. We had all just finished breakfast and were waiting for the day to get started. As a CTO, I always preached to my trainees that you treat every ring like it's going to be your most crucial call. On this day, I didn't take my own advice and was blindsided by what I heard. There was a strong male voice on the other end of the line. He was direct and matter of fact, "I'm going to kill myself. I need you to get people here before my family gets home or someone calls them." I'm not sure how many seconds passed before I spoke, and I'm sure when I started to speak I was stammering for the right words to say. In all of our early training how many times do we hear, "If they are calling to tell you they are going to commit suicide, then you have a good chance of keeping them on the line until help arrives." My caller was calling to tell me, but he wasn't going to stay on the line. He never changed his verbiage. He never changed his tone. He never wavered. His only concern was that we find him before his family did. The only time I was able to distract him from this talk was to ask him how we could find him if he wouldn't tell me where he was living. He was calling from a cell phone, before Phase II was implemented, so I had no location. This is the only question that caused him pause. Unfortunately, he had a quick remedy. He walked outside in his yard, I assume to address my concern that we wouldn't be able to find him. In my mind, I can still hear the gunshot and the line going dead. My very first thought was, "He told me he was going to kill himself. That means he mean the gunshot and the nine gong dead. My very first thought was, "He told me he was going to kill himself. That means he really just wanted someone to listen. He wasn't supposed to do that!" That is the first time I realized that, although our training is crucial, every call is different. Every call has a different outcome. No call will end exactly the same, no matter our training. My next experience occurred three years later. At the agency where I worked, we normally had five telecommunicators working. But, three individuals were running three radio channels that day. I was running channel one that afternoon, which monitored traffic units and specialized units. Thankfully, they had been quiet that afternoon, so I was able to help on phones. When I answered the call, every hair on my neck stood up. Completely the opposite of the strong male caller from three years before, this voice was small, meek and very scared. It was a female caller saying that she had found some old ammunition in her home. She asked for a deputy to come and retrieve it. She told me she had two small girls that were at school and she wanted it to be gone before they returned home. I can't tell you why I immediately knew something was wrong, but at that exact moment, I did. I asked her several questions about the ammunition-where she found it and what kind of ammunition it was-while getting my partner on channel two to get a unit on the way. My partner looked at me questioningly, and all I could say was that I wasn't sure but that something was wrong. As I continued to ask questions, she started to become agitated. She became more and more persistent that I get a deputy there before her girls came home. Reluctantly, I asked the question I knew I needed to ask. I hoped for a different outcome than the call three years before. "Ma'am," I said, "do you want to hurt yourself?" All I heard on the phone was low and heartbreaking sobs. My suspicions were confirmed. Thankfully, this call had a better ending. The deputies arrived quickly. When they got to the home, they found she had enclosed her closet with plastic. A handgun was lying on the floor. There was a note on the door that said, "Please don't let my girls come in, police only." There are not many days that go by that I don't think about that young mother. I wonder if her life changed for the better. I wonder if she received the help she needed. To say these two specific calls didn't change or affect me as a telecommunicator and a person would be a lie. I was forever changed by both of these calls-even though each had very different endings. This job makes us many things. Unfortunately, callous can be one of them. For so long mental illness was stigmatized, and no one wanted to talk about or give a face to it. In the early part of my career, that stigma was prevalent. But, over time my personal experience taught me three things. First, even the strongest voice can have a heartbreaking message. When that strong and steady male voice came across that 9-1-1 trunk, never did I imagine the message he would be giving me. It took a few seconds to register what he was saying. The message that he was delivering, no matter how devastating, never wavered. Second, even when the training statistics show one thing, situations don't always turn out the way they are "supposed" to. We have all been in training that tells us if a person is calling, it is a good sign, and we still have the opportunity to intervene. However, knowing that is NOT a reason to think they will not go through with their attempt. Keeping them talking, asking questions and keeping them calm are all parts of the training we must keep in mind. The most important thing on the minds of both callers was that their family members not be able to find them before we did. I can't say with any certainty that either of them would have called had it not been for that concern and fear. Neither one was calling to discuss the "why" of their actions; they were calling simply out of concern for their loved ones. Last, there is no substitute for "gut instinct." As the old saying goes, "When in doubt, send them out." In those moments of a call when your hairs stand up on the back of your neck, listen to your instincts. Rely on what you've been taught. However, knowing that is NOT a reason to think they will not go through with their attempt. Keeping them talking, asking questions and keeping them calm are all parts of the training we must keep in mind. The most important thing on the minds of both callers was that their family members not be able to find them before we did. I can't say with any certainty that either of them would have called had it not been for that concern and fear. Neither one was calling to discuss the "why" of their actions; they were calling simply out of concern for their loved ones. Last, there is no substitute for "gut instinct." As the old saying goes, "When in doubt, send them out." In those moments of a call when your hairs stand up on the back of your neck, listen to your instincts. Rely on what you've been taught. Listen for those statements that send up red flags-statements like, "I don't see a way out," or "No one will miss me." Keep going to your training sessions. Every time someone shares their story, it will be different from your own or the ones I've shared here. Every scenario is one we can all learn from. And, we'll become better at our jobs because of it. If you are a CTO, please take to heart the lessons that I learned in these events. I forgot for a moment to practice what I preached. I forgot to pick up the phone with the mindset, "This could be it." The world that we dispatch in today is far different from the one many of us started in. The next generations of telecommunicators have to learn difficult lessons and perform to today's tough standards. Hopefully, you have leadership in place that understands the importance of training. Take advantage of every opportunity given to you. It doesn't matter how many times you've heard about suicidal callers and the questions to ask in the face of those calls-you will stutter step, you will have to get your composure and your heart will skip. But knowledge is power. Organizations that support mental health initiatives are abundant. Find one in your community that is willing to come in and train for free. All you have to do is ask. A dear friend recently used this quote by Henry Ford, "Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success." Let's work together.