CASE STUDY Avoiding Defensiveness. Not long ago I received a mysterious telephone call from a good friend. He said that he and his wife wanted to discuss a business proposition for us. Tuesday evening? They'd see us then, Our curiosity piqued, we eagerly awaited the rendezvous. What could our friends possibly have up their sleeves? Right on time, the doorbell rang and we were surprised to find George and Margaret dressed in their best suits. They laughed nervously. marched past us, and set up a small demonstration board on our dining room table. Turning down our offer of wine, they asked if we could begin the meeting. This was strange. My wife and I began to feel as if we had invited insurance agents into our home-even though we had camped, hiked, canoed, and spent many an eve- ning with George and Margaret. But our curiosity was aroused. so we played along. it wasn't long before the experience became frustrating. George and Margaret asked us what we wanted out of life. We suggested that they probably should have some idea of that by now-we want to be good parents, and that most of our other goals were inward, state-of-being kinds of goals. They responded by suggesting that it might be nice if we never again had to worry about money. This was puzzling, but we agreed that it would, indeed, be pleasant. At this, they hauled out charts, graphs, and illustrations that, they claimed, proved that we could double our present income in a little over a year-in our spare time, of course. After an hour, George and Margaret still refused to tell us what it was we would have to sell (we'd figured out that much) or to whom we'd have to sell it. Something was definitely wrong. I was in my own dining room with my wife and my friends, yet felt as if were back in middle school being told to please hold all my questions until the end. I've had similar experiences with aggres- sive salespeople. It was dehumanizing. Finaly, George and Margaret revealed the name of the com- pany and its line of products and set about the task of showing how rapidly the company had grown as a result of its unique marketing concepts. But I had already decided not to accept their proposition. I felt insulted and abused by my friends. Why hadn't they simply told us that they were involved with the company (which we had heard of long before) and that they would like to explore the possibilities of our becoming involved as well? With friends, it would be a much more effective approach-certainly a more honest one. Finally, they asked for our comments and questions. I was ready. I evaluated their entire presentation, emphasizing their fail- ure to analyze their audience and to adapt their communication style accordingly. George and Margaret were shocked and hurt. They had not, they said, come into our home to be criticized. If they had offended us, they were sorry. No, they still did not care for a glass of wine. And they left abruptly. Questions for Analysis: Avoiding Defensiveness 1. What previously existing group norms can you inter from this case study? How were the norms violated? What were the consequences? 2. Which of Gibb's "defensive communication behaviors can you identity? Do you see any evidence that anyone tried to use sup portive communication? 3. What evidence of group cohesiveness can you identity? 4. What kinds of confirming and disconfirming responses can you identify? 5. What recommendations would you give George and Margaret for avoiding such trouble in the future? What advice do you have for the case study's writer? LTH 2017