1. Identifying Your Conflict Orientations Purpose: Discover your own orientation to conflict.

Instructions: Answer the questions as honestly as you can.

1. When conflict seems about to occur, do you

a. think of arguments that promote your solution?

b. worry that everyone is going to get hurt?

c. think that there’s probably a way to satisfy everyone?

2. When involved in conflict, do you

a. feel competitive urges?

b. feel resigned that everyone will lose?

c. feel committed to finding a mutual solution?

3. When you disagree with another person, do you

a. assume the other person is wrong?

b. assume neither of you is right?

c. assume there are good reasons for what each of you thinks and feels?

2. Identifying Your Styles of Responding to Conflict Instructions: Identify your styles of responding to conflict.

Purpose: Read the scenarios below. For each one, indicate which of the four possible responses you think it is most likely you would follow.

1. The person that you have been dating for 6 months tells you she or he is upset by your lack of interest in spending time with her or his friends. You don’t want to spend time with your partner’s friends, but she or he sees this as an issue that the two of you need to resolve.

In this situation, you would be most likely to

a. walk out on the conversation.

b. tell her/him that the issue isn’t important.

c. say nothing and hope the issue will go away.

d.actively work to find a resolution that satisfies both of you.