7. Distinguishing Aggressive, Assertive, and Deferential Forms of Communication Listed below are five scenarios that describe a situation and your goal in the situation. For each scenario, write an aggressive, assertive, and deferential statement expressing your goal.

Example Scenario: You need to study for an examination, but your boyfriend/girlfriend really wants to go out for dinner and a movie.

Aggressive response: I don’t care about your preferences.

I’m not going out tonight.

Assertive response: I’d like to go out tomorrow or this weekend, but I have to study tonight.

Deferential response: I guess studying isn’t really that important. We can go out if you want to.

a. You think your roommate is angry with you, but you have no idea why, and she or he denied being angry when you stated your perception.

But she or he is acting very distant and unfriendly.

Aggressive response:

Assertive response:

Deferential response:

b. One of your close friends asks to borrow your car. Normally, you wouldn’t mind lending your car to a friend, but this person has a record of speeding and being careless behind the wheel. You can’t afford to have your car wrecked.

Aggressive response:

Assertive response:

Deferential response:

c. A close friend asks you about something very personal. You want to show that you trust the friend, but you don’t want to discuss this topic—even with a close friend.

Aggressive response:

Assertive response:

Deferential response:

d. Ten days ago you lent $20 to one of your coworkers with the understanding that the loan would be repaid within a week. The coworker has not repaid the money nor offered any explanation. You need the loan repaid.

Aggressive response:

Assertive response:

Deferential response:

e. One of the people in a group to which you belong tells racist and sexist jokes. You find the jokes very offensive, but you don’t want to create tension in the group or make the person who tells the jokes feel bad. You just want the jokes to stop.

Aggressive response:

Assertive response:

Deferential response: